Footy tipping blues

Footy tipping has never been a strong point of mine, which is why I've decided that each week I will provide my tips, and I advise you to do the exact opposite in order to succeed.

In fact, for round one, I got two correct. Is it a coincidence that I tipped West Coast to win and my own team, Fremantle to lose? Is that logic or a lack of faith manifesting itself as some sort of psychic awareness? Or just bloody obvious in a blind-Freddie-would-have-seen-that fashion?

I've heard a lot of reasons over the years as to why Fremantle are such a nonentity. It's the anchor around their necks. It's Chris Connelly. It's their lame song. It's Damian Drum. It's the colour purple.

Whether it's because of their fashion choices, taste in music or their coaching staff, they have to have a good season any year now, and while I hope it's this one, I have strong reservations.

Last Saturday they performed their favourite party trick for all of Melbourne (who are still to be convinced of their existence, quite like the Loch Ness Monster or Bigfoot) to see, keeping up and looking good for three quarters and then dropping dead in the fourth. It's a habit now? It's in the mind you say? That is an England-poor excuse and bollocks to that.

They just need to run a few more laps, and when it's raining they should train in the rain. Unless they really would melt, and that would be quite embarrassing for all at Dockerland.

It's still strange seeing cutie-pie whathisname... ... ... ...Paul Medhurst, that's the one, in the black and white. Apparently Chris Tarrant is quite attractive, but I haven't noticed yet. I was too busy watching young Jeffrey in the pocket.

Now, Collingwood and Fremantle will next meet in Round 22 at Subi Oval (yes, I know, they're actually going to leave Melbourne. I too was shocked). And I'm gonna call it for the home team.

In the meantime there are 20 rounds of goodness, in which, one week at a time, the Dockers are going to prove my reservations wrong... right? Right!?